I'm telling you this book the spectacle of death is tripping me out to the fullest.
But in this time, to please Allah like I want I feel like moving to the country and living in solitude. It seems easier, to live off the land is my dream. to wake and give praise. Live pure and be at peace though I'd often feel alone.
Then I feel like a big part of Islam is the community and serving people which I wouldn't be able to do. Maybe cuz i'm in San Francisco on the 4th floor in a studio with no place to build a mosque.
If gambling wasn't haraam i'd win the lotto and buy some land and make a sanctuary for all my brothers and sister who feel the same way.
Salaam Alaikum.